Unstoppable ME Makes Unstoppable Girls #GirlsUnstoppable
This post is part of YummyMummyClub.ca‘s support of the Dove® Unstoppable Moms for Unstoppable Girls Contest. I received compensation as a thank you for my participation. This post reflects my personal opinion about the information provided by the sponsors. Go to www.UnstoppableMoms.ca to enter by sharing how you inspire girls to reach their full potential.
I remember a childhood full of fun memories, always playing with the neighbourhood kids, usually the boys because I could relate better to them. Girls seemed hard to get along with, callous towards each other almost. Everything seemed to change when my preteen years came; puberty did a number on my self-esteem. I grew quickly; my arms and legs seemed longer than most and oh, did I hate, hate, HATE my nose….it was too big! I was already slightly an outcast by the “popular” kids and every chance they got, they seemed to tear all the kids that didn’t belong down. As awkward as I felt in my own skin, I didn’t let that keep me from trying things; I did belong, I just had to push myself to find my place.
Growing up I wasn’t extremely outgoing, in fact I was very shy. I was interested in a lot of things but my shyness often held me back. When I developed as a preteen I struggled with confidence holding me back even more. At 13 years old some of my friends had signed up with the city league for girls softball; I thought it sounded fun and convinced my parents to sign me up. My mom thought I was nuts; I had never played before and I wasn’t exactly coordinated. These were girls that had played ball since they were little and here I was a first-timer at the age of 13. The memory of my very first practice sits strong in my memory; I wasn’t placed on a team with my friends and my teammates weren’t exactly welcoming, neither were the coaches who happened to be the star players parents. It was obvious they weren’t happy I was on their team. I wasn’t a great player; I felt awkward and couldn’t seem to get my limbs to follow what my mind had set out, striking out more than actually getting on base and probably the reason I was stuck in outfield but I liked it. Playing baseball was embarrassing to me. Many times I wanted to quit because I felt like the kids and parents were judging me, thinking that the girls were snickering or making fun of me, that how awkward I felt was what they thought of me. I did not want to be a quitter; my love of the game kept me from quitting before the season was done and although I had chosen to retire from baseball, pushing myself to see it through helped pave the road to who I am today.
Now with 2 preteen girls of my own, I raise them to be proud of who they are, to be comfortable in their own skin. My eldest daughter especially has had self-image problems all her life; she has always been the tallest, always developed quicker and even as a toddler people would judge her for how she looked or behaved. As a tween she developed a more womanly body while her classmates remained in child-like bodies; this was very hard on her and she often commented on how “fat” she was. Each of my daughters have had their struggles with their self-confidence keeping them from wanting to see commitments through but as tough as it is sometimes, I push them to see the value in following through. As moms we should always encourage our girls to try different things, to be their cheer leader. If we hear our own daughters speaking of another girl in a critical way, we have the responsibility to squash that behavior, teach our daughters to be more empathetic to others, to stand up for another and to make other girls feel special too. A simple compliment can mean so much.
I am here to talk my girls through their feelings. I have always taken the role as a nurturer and caregiver. As a tween, I took on a volunteer position at the local hospital to help care for the patients. As a young adult, I took on a career as an Emergency Medical Dispatcher were I talked people in crisis through some of their hardest times; I was their ear when they were broken. I spent 13 years in that position and received a Stars of Life award for exemplary service from the Governor General, which was a quiet acceptance. Today as a stay at home mom, our house is buzzing with the kids and their friends who feel comfortable spending time with our family when maybe their home lives aren’t quite as comfortable. I encourage the girls to try things, to do their best and as long as they have tried their best then they should stand proud. My girls are unstoppable!
Are you an unstoppable mom? Share YOUR story about a time when you thought about quitting an activity you loved because of how you felt about your body and let them know how you think moms/role models can better support girls to participate in activities. You have until June 13, 2013 to enter. You could win $2,500 for yourself and $2,500 will be donated to help raise a girl’s self-esteem.
Check out more stories on YummyMummyClub.ca about amazing unstoppable moms:
http://www.yummymummyclub.ca/family/mummy/unstoppable-moms-for-unstoppable-girls
You are an unstoppable mom! Your girls are beautiful, and I hope you and your girls are able to navigate the teen years with ease!
Thanks Katie; I hope we survive! lol
I love this series of post. @Inkscrblr also wrote a wonderful post. I am going to have to find them all. I love your pic as a child. So cute!
Just search the hashtag and you will find them all; very inspiring!
I loved reading your story Stacey. Most kids would have dropped out of softball after discovering they weren’t playing on the same team with their pals. The fact that you stuck it out until the end speaks volumes of your perseverance and character.
Thank you Deanna. I think you are right and I did really want to quit, I remember the anxious feeling like it was yesterday. I think it’s really important to teach our kids this, that no matter how tough things get, it’s important to see things through, to be responsible.
My daughter is going through this phase right now — she’s a very robust 9 year old and feels like she is “fat.” It breaks my heart to see her down about it!
That’s an awful feeling as a mom, knowing they are going through a tough time and there isn’t a lot you can do except be there when she needs you. Life has hard teachings; sometimes we have no choice but to allow our kids to walk that road and hopefully hold their hand along the way.
All through school I was an outcast.. still remembering the phrase “Miss Piggy” etched into my memories as I walked through the hallways. There were many activities that I missed out on in school because I was too scared of what others thought. Luckily now, I’m able to work past comments from others.
Oh hunny, I feel so bad; I can imagine how you felt as a child. No child should have to feel this way and no child should feel like they don’t belong or shouldn’t participate because of things others may say or do. Going through something like that, you can rise above and empower your own children, be there when they need you and help them up when they fall.
Your nose is just perfect! You look stunning!! I had rough times during teen years and I don’t want my girl to go through this! we need to empower them..
Oh thank you Olfa. I don’t think that way now but girls are hard on themselves enough, the last thing they need when going through the awkward years (aka teen years) is others judging them. The last thing we ever want for our children is them to experience these same feelings. I know you’re a strong mom and that will make for a strong daughter; you are her best crutch when it comes to any hard times she may come across.
Frankly I don’t look forward to the emotions of the teen years. I had a really difficult time within myself, being a heavy girl was difficult to digest and I always made myself feel less than. I’m hoping I’m able to convey to my girls what I’ve learned by being Unstoppable.
You will be their best defense against those feelings and rough times. I think just like you said, we are our own toughest critics, that added to others judgments makes for a really rough period of time for our girls. Our girls are unstoppable and we as their moms can teach them that, to be empowered!
I remember how mean kids can be from when I was young, but your daughter’s seem very confident and I am sure that they find strength in you!
Thanks Jennifer; your right, kids can be mean. They are fairly confident but they still come home with their hard moments or challenges, some days are harder than others and I’m glad I can be there when they need me most.
I have little boys but I think it goes both ways. It’s important to teach them to be proud of who they are and comfortable in their own skin!
You are so right Janel. I have boys too and I know first hand at how uncomfortable they can be in their own skin; I think it’s assumed because they’re boys that they should be confident. Not always the case.
Other kids can be so cruel, and it’s usually a way to hide their own self-consciousness. Even worse, overly judgemental parents teach their kids this behaviour.
You know, I think that’s a great point. It is usually the ones who are being harsh that maybe try to hide their own insecurities. I see it a lot with parents and yes, even teachers, and it’s actually quite sad that they teach these kids it’s okay to be cruel and judgmental towards others.
This is an awesome post! I love Dove’s Unstoppable Girl’s Program. Thanks so much for sharing.
Thanks for stopping by Shannon; this is truly an inspiring campaign and something we should all be reminded of when raising our own kids.
I wanted to add that you seem like such a compassionate, encouraging person. Just reading your post and your reply to your readers’ comments is evidence of that. You are the PERFECT person to be an advocate for girls!
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for saying that. It actually bothers me a lot that people in general are so judgmental, often times based on nothing, simply a first impression or first look…sad really; there is always more to the story or more to the person.
Aww, your girls are beautiful and you did great. Kids definitely can be mean and mislead.
Thanks Cin. 🙂 Kids can be cruel and it’s too bad that has to be part of growing up but it makes for stronger character.
I think you were beautiful as a kid, and are beautiful now. Love your story, and somewhat relate to it. I was an awkward kid/teen and until I became a cheerleader I was somewhat shy. It really helped me grow and learn who I was.
Thank you for your kind words. I think as tough as being involved in some team programs can be, it’s good to have that experience to break out of your shell a bit.
That’s why I love the mom blog world, so many empowered women!
And even though I have a boy, I love that I get to teach him courage, honesty, and rspect for everyone, especially women.
It is wonderful to be part of these types of awareness campaigns. I am a mom to boys and it applies to them too. I absolutely love that you mentioned teaching your boys respect for girls/women; that is so important, especially these days.
Kids can be SO CRUEL! The bullies on my bus would always moo and call me Heffer instead of Heather. Having 2 girls myself, I have one that struggles with self esteem issues and another that is confident enough for the both of them.
Awe hunny; I am really sorry you had to endure that. Kids can be so mean! They don’t have the maturity to know how damaging some of their actions can be. You have beautiful girls and what better role model than you for them. I love that she has enough confidence for both…love that!
We have to stop tearing girls down or there will never be equality. It’s odd how {usually} kids are equal, with many girls even excelling at the sciences, until middle school & puberty. I was lucky in that my family was very much a “you can do whatever you’d like” group. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I realized not everyone had that support system.
That is very true, not everyone has a great support system and the reason these campaigns make such an impact.
You have such a beautiful family! They are lucky to have such an awesome mom.
Thank you very much for the kind words 🙂
I was also a very shy and awkward girl. Thanks for sharing your story and this great campaign!